Twelve Irritating Food Scenarios

By Hanitizer

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For a blog that has the world Kabob on it, we do not get to talk about food much, and since I like food and I like to talk about it, I took the liberty of writing a list of things and practices I find irksome to me. I hope you can relate to some of these scenarios are universal. But a quick word of advice, if you have a certain diet, do not invite me over for a potluck, please I would rather give you cash instead.
to read the entire list please go to Divine Caroline.

A hottie near my food: Hotties of the universe if there is a reception, a wedding, or any occasion where food trays are laid out for me to grab, stay away from standing near the food. I cannot load my dish if you are standing next to the food line. I am self-conscious, so help me and other males by give us a chance to pig out away from your sight. I can do one thing or the other, admire your beauty, or admire the work of the chefs. No, I am not going to do what married guys do, which is just ignore you.

Nuts: To my follow host, easy on the nuts! Do not sprinkle them everywhere; you know some of us have allergies to nuts. So keep your pine nuts and almonds away from my plate. I know nuts are expensive, so this is my gift to you in these financial tough times. Is it written somewhere in the food guide, that you cannot have rice without topping it with some sort of nuts? Keep your nuts stored in the dark.

Bacon This: American diners love to hook me up with a bit of extra bacon … it is ok to racially profile me to prevent me from eating bacon. I know bacon eaters love it and swear by it, but this is a free country. I try to always ask about their bacon policy, but most of the time the serves does not know. Get this, most Clam Chowder soups are started with bacon. I did know that pigs occasionally fly, but swim in the sea is a first.

The Stingy Couple Who Refuses to Tip: that’s their choice, but when their choice makes me a partner in crime, I refuse to take part in that. It’s always a couple that has some philosophical reasons not to tip the poor waiter, and instead just pay for their share; they of course neglect the tax too. So I usually do not go out with these people again; maybe I am helping them save extra money to put in their 401 K.

To read the entire list click here