My Phone and I

So, three weeks ago, my phone broke down! A week later, I have a new phone; a week later I lose my new phone! I dropped this one from my pocket on the Metro in DC on a Friday night. I checked the lost and found and I think my phone is a not coming back

I do not know why I keep losing my phones at such a regular basis, I lost another one about a year ago back at BYU campus. I forgot this one on the bus. My phones have gotten accustomed to public transportation, I guess!

I have came up with a way to make sure that my phone always comes back to me, no matter who finds it, will have to get it to me. If they do not get the phone to me, they will give it to the proper authorities. I will put some numbers that any one will see on my phone, will run to the FBI or the CIA to give them the phone since they will collect a reward for uncovering a plot. The following numbers will be on my speed dial

1-Osama Bin Hidey
2-Terrorist # 1
3-Hezballah dating Services
4-Terrorist # 2
5-Guantanamo Help desk
6-Supplies
7-Frequent Flayer Club
8-Virgin Airlines
9-Terrorist # 3

I guarantee whoever finds a phone with these numbers will turn it in to the proper authorities who in turn will further investigate it. I would either get my phone back right away or they may send me on a free vacation to that little small island in the Caribbean!